u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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