Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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