is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize