She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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