Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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