i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
