all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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