he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
