Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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