he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I need to calm my uterus...
I would fuck him just for his dog
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