Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
