this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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