I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize