is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
