I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
