You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
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