He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize