Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
You need a sexual gate keeper
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize