i jhust puked up my retainher.
I want to make a zoo with you.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
