Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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