Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
