I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
