Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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