Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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