Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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