If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
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