im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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