Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Such a big mess for such a small penis
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
