If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
