if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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