They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
