Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
