That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
