Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
