Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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