No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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