im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Randomize
