I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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