so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
