But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
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