so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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