is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
