youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
