Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
It's blow job season.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize