Ambien. No doubt about it.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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