What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
