I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
