Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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