i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
