I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Randomize
