I think im going to throw up on grandma
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
